The importance and beauty of receiving validation is that, how a person feels does not require a defence using quantifiable facts, but is rather acknowledged, on its own, as real.
Why would anyone say, “I wish I had cancer”? Yet, I have said it myself and found that I am not the only person living with a mental illness to say or think the same thing. Of course, we don’t want cancer and I can’t pretend to have any comprehension of what it must be like to have cancer or watch a loved one suffer from the devastating effects and treatment. What we are really saying is that we ache to be able to share our diagnosis and receive the same outpouring of love, compassion, sympathy and support we see given to someone who shares their cancer diagnosis. Just as a person who has cancer has pain, treatment challenges, decreased independence, extra strain on their family, the need for a listening ear, financial devastation and/or the loss of employment those of us with mental illness experience the same. Our hearts ache to be received and treated with the same compassion and support. We wish we could speak up and say, "I have bipolar", and have complete confidence that people will rally around us. Perhaps this sounds selfish or even jealous; however, it is not that we want those with cancer, or any other serious illness, to receive any less support, we just wish that we could receive it as well. The Susan G. Komen Foundation is a tremendous example of how a once taboo subject and diagnosis have been transformed. I dream of the time when mental illnesses can receive the equivalent research funding, public support and nonjudgemental embrace that breast cancer receives. That is the reason I am writing this blog, if I have the ability to speak up I need too, otherwise, illnesses such as bipolar disorder will continue to weighed down by stigma. I have been thankful to see the progress that we have made in many more people being able to openly discuss their diagnosis of depression or anxiety and be received with support and compassion. I look forward to the day when those of us with bipolar disorder will be received that way as well. I am also grateful for the public figures with bipolar disorder who have “come out” and shared their diagnosis and experiences. Perhaps a sliver lining to my current situation is that I may openly speak out about my illness without fear of it negatively impacting my career. I understand that others do not have that luxury...perhaps the only time unemployment could be considered a luxury.
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